When Sue Met Miriam
If I’m honest, I didn’t know that much about Miriam Margolyes when I was given a ticket to see her at the theatre the other night.
I only knew she was a very rude but well-spoken older lady who loved the C-word, is always a disaster waiting to happen on live TV, doesn’t suffer fools lightly, and appeared in Harry Potter.
But oh Miriam, how that has changed now! Her show was not only the most entertaining one I’ve seen in ages, but the perfect pick-me-up for when the world is getting you down.
This amazing 84-year-old, who can still capture an audience’s unwavering attention, has had quite an illustrious acting and voice-over career, ranging from a love of Charles Dickens to the Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny and piles cream!
She’s highly intelligent, stands up to bullies even though she’s only 4ft10 tall, and has always been a civil rights campaigner and a political activist. Her shitty description of a certain US President was hilarious, while her thoughts on atrocities taking place in other parts of the world sobering.
There was also gossip about various British acting treasures such as Maureen Lipman, John Cleese and Dames Maggie Smith and Judie Dench. While if you go on to read her best-selling Little Book of Miriam, she also recalls a disastrous royal curtesy, plus a farting competition with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Miriam has an astounding repertoire of accents she taps into with ease. Acknowledging that she naturally does have an awfully posh one, Miriam doesn’t like it - believing it makes her sound as if she thinks she’s better than everyone else.
What surprised me most about this rather outspoken octogenarian though, wasn’t that she proudly calls herself the filthiest person she’s ever known - due to a love of shocking people with her foul language. No. It was the poignant life advice she hands out.
Truth and Kindness
Saying she doesn’t want to just be remembered for her rudeness and liberal use of the C-word, Miriam also wants to be known for speaking truth and kindness. Telling people to get off their screens and read an f-ing book, she also urges them to be true to themselves. Although she may appear confident on the outside, Miriam admits she’s just as afraid as everyone else on the inside. That’s why as you enter a room, her advice is to take a deep breath and say to yourself – I Matter.
Her love for her much missed parents shone through brightly in this show. In her book she mentions one of her mummy’s (as she calls her) favourite sayings - Cast your bread on the water and it will come back as sandwiches.
Be daring, is Miriam's interpretation of this. Don’t hold on to safe ideas in life, she urges us, be generous and you will be rewarded.
And of course, you can’t mention an interaction with Miriam Margolyes, without mentioning the bad language and the worst word of all – see you next Tuesday.
I am not offended by colourful language, although I do believe there is a time and place for everything in life, and accept that some people do find it offensive. But as Miriam said, if anyone is offended, why the F were they at her show anyhow?!
Plus I’ve often wondered who decides what words become so offensive anyhow? And why is this particular one, which describes parts of the female body, the worst one of all? Did men decide that? Is it a rerun of female persecution and the witch trials once again?!
So for me, the bleeping not only demonstrated the power of words, but it was also hands down the funniest part of her show – especially when poor Emily, the signer standing on stage all night, had her work cut out.
And what amused Miriam most of all was that this theatre audience in Tunbridge Wells, which is often described as being a posh town with 'disgusted of Tunbridge Wells' being its tagline, taught a rather naughty lady a few rude words she didn't know!
Thanks to the family member who unfortunately missed out on this little joy of seeing Miriam live, I am now a big fan. I’m avidly reading her new book called The Little Book of Miriam which is a hilarious A-Z of her life. I’m currently at the letter C and probably won’t be surprised by what I find!